I like to think that I have a very collaborative leadership style, but sometimes I find it hard to balance being collaborative and being a leader. Sometimes they feel in conflict. Servant-driven leadership tells me I’m in my role to serve others. Harvard Business Review's How to Be a Purpose-Driven Leader Without Burning Out points out that
When a leader frames their decisions solely through a lens of trying to be as helpful and supportive to their constituents as possible, it’s a recipe for burnout. At worst, it breeds entitlement, where employees think the leader’s job is to do nothing but make them happy. The sum of this emotional turmoil can keep leaders from making tough (but correct) decisions.
Collaborative leadership says I should regularly seek out a diversity of opinions and ideas among teammates to build strategies and solve problems. I strongly believe in this, but the devil is in the details. When do I ask for opinions?
My leadership coach taught me a great lesson in helping my team succeed: Set your vision, clarify your expectations, then support them in achieving those expectations. Many of the failures as both the leader and the led have resulted from lack of communication of expectations. At times, as the leader, setting expectations feels non-collaborative. After all, shouldn’t everyone’s ideas should be heard? Are everyone’s opinions of equal weight? Eugene Erik Kim said
[I]n the most effective groups, everybody is most certainly not equal. If I were stranded on an island with a pilot, and we came across a plane, I would gladly defer to the pilot as to how to fly it off the island. I don’t have equal knowledge, and treating me as if I did wouldn’t help either of us. But that doesn’t mean I couldn’t contribute in useful ways.
From my experience, it often comes down to timing. In some situations, the leader is the pilot who needs to paint the vision and define the shape and boundaries of that vision before the rest of the team bring their knowledge and expertise to the table. Collaboration doesn’t hinge on everyone contributing at the same time. It does, however, rely on recognizing each team member’s strengths and enabling them to contribute to the problem solving at the right time.
We want to know that we matter. We want to bring our best selves to our work, and we want to be recognized for the contributions we make. When everybody in a group is contributing his or her best self, and something greater than the sum of the individuals emerges as a result.
In contrast to servant leadership where the leader is reactive and trying to please everyone, purpose-driven leadership focuses on impact - “when leaders and teammates alike are in shared pursuit of a cause bigger than themselves.”
In purpose-driven leadership, once vision and expectations are clear, what does support look like? It’s not asking how you can help but instead asking this:
What do you need to be successful in accomplishing our goal? What help will you need to get? This small language change reframes the emotional dynamic. Instead of the leader having to be solely responsible for supporting the employee, asking the employee what they need to be successful creates a shared sense of responsibility.
I’m trying to find my way as a people pleaser, a leader with experience and a vision, and a collaborative person who truly sees the need for expertise of others.
Comments